The Domestic
by ThwippThwipp
Summary: Sasori struggles to deal with his own feelings and sense of superiority after he and Deidara have a particularly vicious argument. Luckily, the other Akatsuki members are around to help lend perspective to the socially-inept Puppet Master, lest he lose his partner forever. Contains copious amounts of shonen-ai (SasoDei) and kick-ass BrOTPs. COMPLETE
1. The Fallout

_In this slight twisting of the Naruto Universe, all of the Akatsuki pairs share a house – more like a large compound consisting of three buildings: their own separate 'house' on each side and a communal sort of area in the middle (e.g. kitchen, bathroom (a luxury one – sort of like a hotspring)). These compounds are scattered over the nations in many different places and are, of course, hidden._

_Sasori may seem to adopt a slightly misogynistic tone at times during this fic as canonically he seems to hate the female gender. Rest assured that I am a feminist and do not condone his world view at all, let alone tolerate it. Deidara couldn't give a fuck what gender you are (he's probs pansexual too – let's be honest)._

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1: The Fallout<strong>

_"__Dance, fucker, dance!"_

Sasori rolled his eyes at Deidara's latest annoying mid-fight expression. His expletive vocabulary had been fairly low when he had first joined the Akatsuki. But ever since Hidan had joined their band of merry men (plus that strange woman Konan), well…things had never been the same. Or quiet.

As to which 'fucker' Deidara was making 'dance' well, after a particularly boring assassination the two S-Rank _shinobi_ had stumbled across a rogue band of Iwagakure _nin_ consisting of one _jounin_ and three eager _chuunin_. The _jounin_ was particularly annoying in that her lava release _jutsu_ just seemed to spread _everywhere_. Like one of Deidara's stupid explosions.

Wooden puppets and extremely hot flame-mud did not mix. At all.

The _chuunin_ had been fairly easy to pick off, and had dropped like flies. No pun intended considering the form of sculpture Deidara had chosen to set off at the base of their spines.

So far Sasori had merely stood back as Deidara toyed with the so-called ninja team. Their efforts had been laughable to say the least. Hell, Sasori had nearly cracked a smile when Deidara had cracked their spines.

Speaking of smiling, Deidara had not wiped that infuriatingly superior grin off of his sun-burnt cheeks since they had stumbled across the lackluster _shinobi._ His laughing was obnoxiously loud and Sasori did not hide his scowl. Fighting _could_ be fun…but these were just _chuunin_ and a silly old _jounin_. Deidara couldn't really be getting off on this could he?

Suddenly, the earth beneath Hiruko began to shake violently and a large wall of lava erupted in front of Sasori, blocking Deidara from his view. Sasori leapt back in surprise and landed on a looming branch overhead to get a better view. _Huh._ That _jounin_ had at least one good _jutsu_ up her sleeve afterall.

The _jounin_ was now angrily pacing on the forest floor, likely looking for Deidara who had disappeared. Sasori quickly spotted his young partner, who was lying spread-eagled on a wide branch and panting. A shot of panic ran through his system.

Sasori, quite involuntarily, found himself launching out of the protective shell that was his battle-puppet Hiruko and making his way towards his partner, his heartbeat quickening. Deidara had managed to clamber to his feet and was wobbling slightly, a hefty sculpture in one hand.

But Sasori did not care. He wanted Deidara as far away from that awful _jounin_ as soon as possible. _The boy had nearly been knocked out._ Sasori's stomach cable lashed out, flying through the air and wrenched Deidara off of the branch forcibly by his ankle. Deidara yelped in anger and confusion as he was thrown back violently, the cable launching him through the air. The sculpture was lost and exploded uselessly in the air.

Finally the cable let go, sending the young Akatsuki member hurtling straight towards Sasori. The puppet-master blinked twice and was sent tumbling backwards as Deidara's weight hit him squarely in the chest. The two went sprawling into the dirt, kicking up large clouds of dust.

Panic erupted through Sasori's chest and he scrambled through the leaf litter to get to his partner who was lying motionless on the forest floor.

Deidara's head had fallen back limply against the burnt soil, his cobalt eyes frighteningly wide in utter shock. Sasori peered down at his ward, finding him completely unresponsive, with only the occasional whimper of pain sounding from his lips. Sasori clasped Deidara's cheek with his hand, his teal nails scratching slightly at Deidara's pale skin as he moved Deidara's face roughly from side to side. Sasori frowned at the lack of reaction, his brown eyes seeming to flash in anger.

"You assholes done yet?"

The puppet master's head swiveled frighteningly fast to face the lava-release _nin_ jeering at the two Akatsuki members sprawled in the dirt. A vast and intense anger settled over the puppet master making his vision haze, but he wasn't quite sure why. The lava _nin_ seemed rather pathetic and hadn't even scratched either of them.

"Not at all. But you shouldn't be surprised to know that we Akatsuki can multitask. I can administer medical attention and deal with your pathetic ass at the same time."

Sasori's tone was dull, but internally he was positively seething. He couldn't wait to splatter this woman's innards all over the surrounds. The woman's expression twisted angrily and she began to make rapid hand signs. Sasori rolled his eyes. This was going to be too easy. Battles weren't fun anymore.

Sasori loomed over Deidara and allowed his 'wings' to unfurl from his back, shredding his Akatsuki cloak in to pieces in the process. Sasori grimaced; Kakuzu would not be pleased. The cloaks were not easy to make and were made from expensive materials. _Money, money, money. _The blades began to whirr rapidly, forming a shield of sorts as the lava-release _jutsu_ bombarded them unrelentingly.

Sasori turned his attention back to Deidara who was coming to.

"What hurts?" Sasori ventured coolly, ignoring the searing heat that was beginning to scorch his wooden frame.

Deidara groaned and clutched his head dramatically, _"Everything."_

"You're going to have to be more specific."

Deidara scowled, _"I meant what I said_. Plus, I think my ankle is broken – wait, why's it so hot?"

Sasori inclined his head to see the _nin_ still throwing magnificent fire blasts at them. Her expression was utterly furious and it made Sasori want to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. Honestly, who the hell did she think she was, attacking not one but _two_ Akatsuki members?

_"__Don't pretend I'm not here you bastards! You'll pay for what you did to my team!"_

Deidara's brow furrowed, "That _nin_ is still alive?"

Sasori clutched the bridge of his nose and sighed angrily. He made a familiar hand movement and the shouts quickly stopped. Sasori didn't need to look over his shoulder to know that Hiruko had impaled her through the chest and sliced upwards smoothly, sending little bits of _woman_ scattering everywhere. Sasori smiled at the image in his head and decided to turn around anyway to enjoy it.

"I can multi-task."

Deidara slowly rose to his feet, wobbling visibly as he regained his footing. His loud cursing gave Sasori cause to turn back around. It appeared the brat's ankle _was_ broken. Deidara focused an intense and angry stare at Sasori and shoved him roughly.

"Speaking of multitasking, _what the fuck was that?_ I had the situation under control! Why the _hell_ did you throw me from that tree, _danna_?"

Sasori found himself quite speechless, eyes widening at Deidara's rampant verbal tirade and physical move against his master.

"I-I-"

Meanwhile, Deidara was fuming. His voice seemed to increase in volume as his anger became more apparent.

"What? Do you think I can't handle myself, Sasori? I'm not a child anymore! I can undertake these missions! I don't see what your problem is either, we've done this shit a million times before and I've _never_ let you down!"

Sasori's patience had worn down. Probably not a new record, but impressive for the amount of time he'd pushed himself to put up with Deidara's obnoxious ranting.

"I don't have to explain my actions to _you_ of all people. You just accept them and carry on, so shut your mouth, brat. Remember who you're speaking to, I'm not your friend, I'm your _superior._"

"Superior _my ass._ You can't even trust me to finish the job you_ puppet fucker."_

Sasori's drab eyes widened quite involuntarily and he felt a sharp blow strike his ego and his sense of seniority over Deidara. _Deidara_, who had never talked to him like that before, not even during their more heated debates – the young man had never resorted to such demeaning name-calling, at least not to his face. Sasori was more than used to the likes of Hidan referring to him with such vulgar terms but when Deidara said it…Sasori felt an overwhelming sense of _betrayal_.

Undoubtedly, a nerve had been struck within Sasori and before he could restrain himself, his hand flew out in front of him and connected powerfully with Deidara's face. Deidara stumbled back in shock clutching his face, his expression wounded.

_"__Don't ever talk to me like that again, brat." _

Sasori distantly heard himself practically hissing at Deidara whose shoulders had crumpled and face was pale, save for the glaring red hand mark upon his cheek. The puppet master quelled any sickly feeling that arose within him at the sight of the mark, but felt something akin to nausea despite his best efforts.

* * *

><p>The flight back to their compound was eerily quiet and Sasori found himself staring blankly ahead at the open sky, through the eyes of Hiruko, as the fantastic clay bird soared happily amongst the clouds. However, its creator was seemingly less so, as he huddled with his chin resting on his knees as he sat atop his own bizarre clay beast. Sasori couldn't help his wandering gaze as the overwhelming sense of nausea continued to eat away at him, causing his chest cavity to seemingly sit uncomfortably within his wooden frame despite his lack of sensation. He was glad of the isolation that his carapace Hiruko lended to him, he wasn't sure he wanted to deal with Deidara again so soon.<p>

As soon as they had stepped foot into the high-walled courtyard of their compound, both of their rings began to grow warm. A projection appeared from Deidara's ring, and the figure stepped closer to them.

The corners of Pein's mouth lilted slightly as he greeted Deidara. Sasori frowned at the exchange, a slimy feeling working its way into his nerves. He was not sure whether he was jealous of how fond, thus blind, his superior was towards Deidara or whether it was something else entirely pervading his thoughts.

Sasori tapped his foot impatiently as the two began to talk casually about how the mission had gone. Finally, Pein took a step backwards.

Deidara barely managed to crack a smile and his teeth seemed to be firmly gritted together, "Thank you, Pein-_sama_. May I leave?"

Pein conceded, the figure from the ring flickered and disappeared. It appeared moments later, this time projected from Sasori's own ring and turned to face the puppet master. Sasori paid him no heed and unashamedly watched Deidara's retreating back instead; noting the stubborn limp and the way his golden hair tossed angrily in a hypnotic rhythm.

_"__Sasori."_

Pein did not look pleased, but Sasori was far too angry to care. The stupid brat's explosive 'art' form not only pervaded his personality but his entire-fucking being too.

_"__What?"_ Sasori spat bitterly, fists clenching and unclenching at his knees as he sulked inside his carapace.

"What happened? Apparently you completely jeopardized the mission and your partner. I know that Deidara likes to exaggerate but he certainly would not lie to me."

Sasori scowled. Hiruko's face, luckily, did not follow suit.

_"__Nothing._ I was just distracted and naturally the brat likes to overreact to everything."

Pein's frown did not leave his frightentingly pale face, but lingered, boring into Hiruko's eye sockets, thus Sasori's eye sockets. Sasori _supposed_ that his skin was meant to be crawling, but such sensation would not overtake him in his current state of being.

"Do not get distracted again, Sasori. This is out of character for you. I expect better results in the future."

Sasori knew what he meant. If he did not resolve this issue, Pein would simply place him with someone else. A massive bout of nausea hit him again, seemingly into his non-existent gut and Sasori's fingers twitched involuntarily, suddenly overcome by the need to bury his dead fingers into the abdomen of one of his victims and tear their guts out so very slowly. His dead fingers itched for his tools and he all but scuttled to his workshop as Pein's figure disappeared from view.

* * *

><p>Sasori's hands were buried wrist deep in the now still abdomen of his latest material; two Kirigakure<em>-nin<em> that he had 'collected' a few days prior courtesy of a very tiresome 'scroll-fetch' errand. Chunks of muscle and organs were painted up and down his pale arms and he took pleasure from the _squelching_ as his pallid fingers tightened around the swimming parts. The material had long since stopped screaming and writhing, having passed out after roughly ten minutes. It had been rather _disappointing_…most of the material he gathered usually passed out after twenty minutes.

Sasori closed his eyes and sighed deeply letting his fingers slide and brush over the slippery organs soothingly. Art was always an escape for him, from the shitty world he lived in. He let his hands trace his own face momentarily, to let the staining blood run down his pale face. The copper streaks ran rampantly down his cheeks and nose, trickling from his chin and onto the dusty floor.

Momentary imperfection, supposedly everything Sasori hated, but something that strangely made him feel _alive_. What better way to fight than ruthlessly and bloodily? Long, drawn out fights promised longer suffering and more blood like rain painting the earth with its beautiful auburn hues. But fights were still a momentary action, a mere ink splatter on the eternal scroll of time. What was this strange confliction?

Harsh laugher sounded. Brittle yet deranged. It was a faint sound, but Sasori's workshop was quiet, save for the breeze channeling through the window which resounded off of the many wooden limbs and severed parts adorning the ceiling, like a twisted wind-chime. The familiar sound pervaded Sasori's mind and his eyes snapped open and he let his hands fall from his face to clasp the desk. Reverberations of a likely exquisite clay sculpture erupting into a thousand filthy pieces sounded from over the complex, shattering the soothing silence. Sasori's hands mechanically released their hold of the table, leaving harsh indents behind and splintering both hands and wood.


	2. Imbalanced Dynamics

**Chapter 2: Imbalanced Dynamics**

A few days passed and Sasori had still not left his quarters, set on channeling all of his unquenchable and unexplainable anger into his work. He had all but made the finishing touches on the two Kirigakure-_nin _who would now make a perfect set of twin puppets. Also, the large billowing sheets of skin from his latest material had nearly dried, carefully stretched out upon the table to prevent wrinkles from appearing and their organs that had been thrown into his waste bucket had gathered a colourful variety of vermin. Pulling out his flame-thrower had been strangely satisfying. Perfection was always key to this process. _Always._

It was the dawn of the fourth day and Sasori was roused from his meditating by the brittle laughter. It had sounded regularly over the past few days, accompanied by violently loud explosions. The laugh was strangely close-by, which meant his ward was voluntarily nearby. Sasori suddenly threw his screwdriver against the wall roughly. It bounced off and flew into a stack of scrolls. Despite Deidara's apparent proximity, Sasori's side of the compound still seemed too silent. If they had been talking, Deidara would have waltzed in by now and sat himself down by Sasori's messy desk to fiddle with some non-explosive clay. Sasori had been _very_ clear with Deidara on where and when he could use explosives in the compound – mainly limited to Deidara's half of the compound and outside, basically as far away from the puppet master as possible.

They didn't usually talk once they got absorbed in their work, but the brat's presence was, dare he say, _nice_. Sasori sighed but stood to his feet, oiled his joints resignedly, and left the cavity of his room. A confrontation was in order. Sasori found himself unable to work and that is why he found himself wandering over to the dining hall in search of his ward, certain that Deidara had taken a late breakfast.

After what was a short walk later, the compound was definitely not lacking in space, Sasori found himself standing outside of the dining hall, his heart-container feeling unnaturally heavy inside his frame. The sound of voices pervaded the hall and Sasori felt his confidence surge, the other members had stopped by the compound for breakfast which meant that he could ease his way back into Deidara's proximity rather than force an immediate confrontation.

Hoping to scope the atmosphere, Sasori peered in and saw Hidan upturning a salad over his head, Kakuzu neatly eating a bowl of steamed rice, and Kisame tearing away at what Sasori expected was grilled mackerel. Itachi was seated beside the Kirigakure-_nin _with his back perfectly straight and his eating habits impeccable. Surprisingly, Deidara was seated comfortably beside him, flitting between eating his own food and carrying a rather violent 'conversation' with Hidan.

Sasori frowned at his guests; it was extremely unusual for so many Akatsuki members to be in the same place for casual visits. Maybe one or two of them would willingly drop by for a visit, usually not to see him but to chat with Deidara. However having all but three of his co-workers in his compound was _strange_ to say the least. But what had really thrown his nose out of joint was the strange person occupying _his _seat next to _his_ partner.

"What and why the fuck is that sitting on my seat?"

The entire table froze and turned their heads to see Sasori standing in the doorway, his expression stoic save for the slight incline of his left eyebrow which was incredibly telling of how pissed off the puppet-master was. Tobi, the offender of Sasori's sensitivities, was kicking his feet childishly and leering over Deidara's shoulder but had quickly stopped once Sasori had garnered their attentions.

Kisame burst out laughing, his sharp teeth glinting brightly, "For someone who doesn't eat, you're awfully picky about seats, Akasuna!"

"Sasori, this is one of our acolytes Tobi. Tobi, meet Sasori of the Red Sand." Itachi said, introducing the overly happy man in an overwhelmingly dull fashion that only Itachi could pull off.

"Yo! I'm a big _not-fan_ of yours!" Tobi called mischievously, waving sardonically.

Sasori tried to ignore Deidara's soft laughter at the insult.

"Whatever," Sasori said dismissively, a scowl working its way upon his face, "Just get it out of my seat."

Tobi laughed in a tone that grated on Sasori's last nerve, "Eh, _no_, puppet-dude. The table is for those with functioning organs only."

_"__If you want to keep _your_ organs, you'll move, you piece of shit."_

Sasori's eyes widened in surprise as Tobi suddenly leapt to his feet wailing, _"Ahhhh - ! Scaary!"_

He wasn't_ that _scary.

"Sit back down, Tobi." Deidara ordered before turning to frown at Sasori, "Tobi was here first and considering you never actually _use _this seat I think you're just being petty and stupid."

The room froze momentarily, then all hell broke loose.

Hidan's face turned purple and he let out a shrill squeak that might have been a laugh had Kakuzu not reached over at a surprising speed and broken his neck instantly. Kisame's jaw was agog and Itachi choked silently on his meal, both astounded at Deidara's sudden moxie towards Sasori.

Sasori's head turned slowly, inch by inch, wood grinding quietly against wood, to face his partner.

_"__Excuse me?"_

The puppet master levelled a fantastic glare at Deidara and the very walls seemed to peel as the two angry _shinobi _stood their ground, each as stubborn as the other. Tobi suddenly broke their intense scowling match by tapping Deidara on the shoulder playfully.

"That's okay, _sempai_. Tobi will move…_your sempai_ is _scary!_"

_"__Fine."_ Deidara managed, tearing his steely gaze away from his master and sitting back down angrily as Tobi flounced to the other side of the table to sit next to poor Kakuzu who was now ailed by the presence of two idiots.

The entire room seemed to breathe a sigh of relief; glad that breakfast wouldn't be relocated after what would have very likely been an excessively violent and room-destroying fight.

Sasori would have grinned, but liked to maintain a certain appearance around the other Akatsuki members. He sat down smugly next to Deidara and pulled out a screwdriver to work away at a joint on his arm, his other elbow rubbing against Deidara's gently. Sasori didn't miss the distasteful expression Deidara pulled in response to his overbearing presence.

Suddenly, it registered that Deidara had stood up very smoothly to defy him. But who had healed his partner's ankle? Sasori stiffly noted that he should have healed it over four days ago when they had arrived back.

"Your ankle is better then." Sasori said coolly.

Deidara's tone was frosty.

"Kakuzu-_sempai_ is a medic-_nin_. _He_ likes to look out for me."

Sasori nodded. Well, at least _Tobi_ hadn't been the one to heal him.

Deidara fidgeted again as Sasori brushed his arm. He was likely sitting much closer than Deidara would have preferred. Unfortunately, Itachi was to Deidara's right, and Sasori was the lesser of two evils. This was known by anyone in the room who had talked to Deidara for more than five minutes.

Breakfast officially continued when Hidan swore loudly to Jashin as he corrected his fatal neck injury.

* * *

><p>Both Deidara and Sasori walked Itachi, Kisame, and Tobi out of the compound as they set off on yet another mission. It was less of a warm goodbye, and more of a polite gesture that all of the Akatsuki adhered to.<p>

Nevertheless, Deidara politely embraced Tobi in the shadow of the gate. Tobi scooped Deidara up and swung him around merrily in response, causing Sasori's partner to curse colourfully. When he was finally set down, Deidara's face had turned purple and a hefty scowl had appeared upon his face.

Sasori ignored Tobi completely in favour of approaching the two _shinobi _he actually respected, and ignored his urge to punch the masked-_nin_ when he ran his hand through Deidara's long hair playfully.

As Sasori stood back, Deidara proceeded to hug Kisame, and nod awkwardly at Itachi who grabbed his clay-covered hand and shook it anyway, missing Deidara's horrified expression as they parted. Deidara all but ran back inside. Sasori's lips upturned slightly at the site. Deidara really hated Itachi.

Sasori was lifted from his musings by an awkward pat delivered onto his shoulder; the puppet master looked up slowly to see Kisame with the most horrifying grin upon his face.

"…I don't know what to tell you, Akasuna. That boy's a fickle one, that's for sure!"

Sasori stared up at Kisame in overwhelming confusion, "…what? Wait…what are you on about, Kisame?"

Kisame pulled a face and leant in closer to whisper fervently in the puppet-master's ear, "You know…_Deidara."_

Sasori turned his head slightly to face Itachi who merely shrugged at him.

"I don't know what _you_ could have done to piss him off, but maybe if you apologise and treat him or something…you've got a lot of tools on your belt after all."

Sasori's eyes nearly burst from their sockets, despite his usual impeccable composure, _"W-what?"_

To his horror, Itachi was almost smiling at him _encouragingly _and Kisame was patting him on the back whole-heartedly, both seemingly corrupted by their very wrong impression of the situation. Sasori was left speechless as the _shinobi_ left the complex, Kisame's raucous laugh haunting him long after they had departed.


	3. Marriage Counselling

**Chapter 3: Marriage Counselling**

Hidan and Kakuzu had yet to leave, and were not likely to depart for a few days. Sasori was unusually pleased for the distraction. He was not quite ready to face Deidara, and Kakuzu gave decent conversation. Of all the other Akatsuki members, Sasori had known Kakuzu the longest and as such they had struck up a fond and timeless camaraderie together. Sasori was less pleased at Hidan's consequent presence. The newest Akatsuki member and undoubtedly the most obnoxious, Hidan was an immortal asshole with a serious case of religious fanaticism. Un-admittedly, Sasori seethed with jealousy at Hidan's easy imperishable state as unlike the crazy zealot, Sasori had worked hard to achieve his immortality. What was more unfortunate was Hidan's fraternity with Deidara. Deidara was loud and annoying, Hidan even more so. Put them together and you were bound for a splitting head ache.

Not to mention Hidan's disdain and outright rudeness towards the puppet-master, which up until a few days ago had not tainted Deidara's perception of Sasori. The brat's recent bout of rebellion had thrown the puppet-master off, to say the least.

So much so, that Kakuzu, and not to mention the rest of the Akatsuki that had broken their fast with them that morning, was aware of it. Kakuzu was twitching in the corner of the guest room where Sasori had effectively cornered him with a tray with sugared treats and a kettle full of green tea. The expensive kind.

"He's out of control, Kakuzu! It's like he's completely thrown all social convention out the window!"

Sasori paced back and forth, his bare wooden feet tapping rhythmically against the wooden floor boards. Kakuzu sat upon a stool, listening half-intently to Sasori's angry mutterings.

Kakuzu did not make an effort to hide his sly grin as he nibbled gracefully on a particularly sugary pink biscuit.

"Ah, welcome to the world of putting up with upstart little shits. Nice show at breakfast by the way."

Sasori's fingers twitched tellingly and Kakuzu quickly dropped his ironic expression, but not his biscuit.

"Well, trust is an important part of any partnership, Sasori. You have little respect for the boy already and don't bother to hide it, but on top of that you seem to have misplaced your faith in him as a capable _shinobi_ as well."

"That hasn't gone unnoticed by Deidara. I suppose he's struggling to garner respect for someone who _consistently_ fails to recognise his own capabilities, someone he thought already _had_. He's a fucking S-Rank Criminal, Sasori, you should know that."

Sasori was silent, staring unblinkingly at Kakuzu, something which never failed to creep on Kakuzu's nerves.

Kakuzu snapped, _"To put it bluntly, he's tired of your shit, Akasuna."_

Sasori's jaw dropped slightly, before he shook his head and recovered. His gaze was intent.

"What do you suggest…?"

* * *

><p>Of all the solutions, <em>"simply hash it out, Akasuna"<em> seemed like the least effective. However, Sasori continued his brave march down the corridor of Deidara's side of the compound quite determinately.

He was pleased to note that he had finally plucked up the courage to engage Deidara and resolve their current issues. To Sasori's dismay, Deidara was already occupied. The fool Hidan was standing – more like leering – over his ward, the both of them laughing raucously.

However, Deidara's eyes were alight with his usual fervor, which invigorated Sasori to continue. If Deidara was in a good mood, he would be easier to talk to.

Sasori's voice was expertly controlled as he approached the pair.

_"__Deidara_. We need to talk. Get over here."

Deidara's shoulders visibly tensed and Sasori felt like rolling his eyes. Deidara was so predictable in his actions. Slowly, Deidara turned to face him, face strangely neutral and Sasori raised an eyebrow. Hidan watched them keenly with interest, his cheeks pink with excitement.

"What?"

Sasori grit his finely polished teeth, _"I said_ we need to talk, brat. Finish your dull banter and get over here."

Deidara's face twisted angrily and Sasori cursed his own harsh words. That was _not_ the way to win friends and influence people.

"No. I'll stop talking to Hidan when I'm ready, _thanks._ You can wait for once in your life, hmm."

Sasori scowled at Deidara's blunt insubordination. _How dare he address him so rudely and refuse him?_

_"__What?!_ Don't you have any inkling of seniority you little shit?"

Deidara's grin was malicious, _"Fuck off_, hmm."

Hidan cackled madly, the earpiercing sound shooting through Sasori's ears and making Sasori's eye twitch. Tiny vibrations ran up his arms as his pale fingers curled into bone-breaking fists making the wood underneath his dead skin splinter forcibly. Sasori paid no heed to his fractured digits as an incredible rage settled over him making everything – _Hidan's jeering face, Deidara's sneering expression, the cold walls _– blur into an ugly mess. If nausea could still affect him, that would be the sensation he cited to this sudden need to purge his surroundings of the filth obstructing his vision. Instinctively, the gentle whirring of his poison-laced cable sounded as it began to unwind from his stomach cavity and inch its way down his leg heading towards Deidara.

Distantly, Sasori saw himself throwing Deidara violently against the wall for his insolence before dragging him across the courtyard, into Sasori's building, and back into his room to forcibly sort this horrific mess out. The harrowing vision vanished quickly and instead the cable halted just above Sasori's ankle.

Deidara would not come willingly and Hidan would probably come to his defense too. Sasori did not want to start a fight – Kakuzu was bound to get involved and if all four of them were fighting…Kakuzu would never forgive them for the damages. Perhaps a new set of tactics was in order? His usual demeanor towards his ward was just not cutting it.

Sasori's musings were his downfall and too quickly, Deidara motioned to Hidan and the puppet master watched his ward head in the opposite direction with his friend who was clutching his ribs in pure ecstasy. Sasori watched them until they finally escaped his sight. He stared down at his splintered fingers and did not wince, but felt a twinge of annoyance – yet another thing to _fix_.

* * *

><p>Kakuzu was pleased to notice that Sasori had more sugared biscuits. He was less pleased that the puppet-master was still incessantly bitching about Deidara.<p>

"…perhaps you should try complimenting him? Maybe earn his trust back that way."

Sasori stopped mid-pace, his wooden arms thrown up in the air in utter exasperation. His head pivoted on his neck inch-by-inch, a sight that made even Kakuzu gag, to face the Takigakure_-nin._

"Compliment him…?" Sasori's voice was strangely high-pitched and overall disbelieving.

Kakuzu nodded thoughtfully, "Of course. He looks up to you. He calls you _danna_, for goodness sake, so your opinion of him must be important to him. So show that you appreciate him."

An explosion sounded from outside and the room shook, sending a shower of dust settling over both Akatsuki members. Deidara's husky laugh and Hidan's manic cheering alerted both superiors to what was going on. Sasori scowled.

"But what on earth do I compliment him on? Even I can't point out the impossible!"

Kakuzu brushed the plaster gently from his shoulders and sighed, _"Ugh_. You are fucking awful. No wonder Deidara's started a rebellion."

* * *

><p>It was later that night that Sasori decided to try again. Deidara was still in the bath house, according to a steamed-pink Hidan who obviously thoroughly enjoyed their high-pressure water system. Sasori would not know of course as he had never actually been in their bathhouse before, not a ridiculous notion as he had never <em>needed<em> to.

A towel-wrapped Kakuzu passed him on the way in and nodded at him encouragingly.

However, Sasori could not imagine complimenting Deidara. It was just too…

What if Deidara laughed or spat at him? Sasori wouldn't be able to handle it. The whole notion was embarrassing. _Deidara_ was the one who complimented Sasori. That was how it worked. It always had worked that way.

But Kakuzu seemed to think it would work, and rarely was Kakuzu wrong about anything.

The puppet-master's eyes struggled to focus through the onslaught of steam but finally they came to rest upon his ward. Deidara was reclining in the bath, his arms stretched out against the rim, his face strangely at ease. He lazily opened one cobalt eye to glare at the man disrupting one of the few moments that he took to relax. Deidara sighed bitterly and raised an eyebrow at Sasori who was subtly staring at the water droplets running down Deidara's neck.

Sasori stood back awkwardly, unable to piece together a way to breach their silence. Finally, he spoke:

"Why are you still in here?"

Deidara frowned at the question, "Not that it's any of your business, but I like to take long baths and I only just got in as the others were leaving. That's it, hmm."

Sasori wriggled his teal-painted toes, the silence pervading his mind.

"…and why are you still in here?" Deidara shot back at him.

"That moron Hidan said you were in h-"

"Obviously."

Sasori's lips tightened. This was not going as planned. He'd better just get it over with.

"…Kakuzu tells me you've been practicing hard at your _taijutsu_ lately."

Deidara's fingers tightened on the rim of the bath.

"…and what did he say?"

"Nothing insulting."

Deidara looked up, "That's surprising."

Sasori nodded, "…quite…uh, well, _I'd _like to see your _taijutsu_ sometime."

Deidara's grip on the tub slipped, and his arms fell like stones into the water. The water slapped noisily over the bath rim due to the sudden disruption. But Sasori wasn't looking at the water.

Deidara's face looked pink – it could have just been the effect of the steam, but maybe it _was_ working. Kakuzu worked wonders.

"Uh, sure thing."

Inspired by Deidara's lack of aggravation, Sasori continued. He had to make Deidara forgive him at all costs.

"We work well together, you and I. All of the Akatsuki think so."

Deidara frowned, but Sasori continued.

"…I should not have stopped you. You fight well enough."

Deidara growled, "You're damned right I do, hmm. And what was up with breakfast the other day, huh, Sasori?"

Sasori's eyes narrowed, "…I'm not sure what you mean."

"The hell you don't! Why must you cause shit over nothing? You never go into the kitchen anyway and now everyone thinks even less of us than they normally do!"

"…don't be ridiculous. You're overreacting, brat."

Sasori immediately sensed that that was the _wrong_ reaction as Deidara stood up abruptly, sending torrents of scalding water spilling over the otherwise spotless tiles, consequently flooding the floor.

"Do you know what the others call us behind our backs? _'That old married couple'_, they say! We're a joke, Sasori, how can that _not_ bother you? "

Deidara's face was purple and his chest heaved with his angry breaths, the water droplets trickling over the stitches that strained to inhibit the ferocious mouth on his chest. Sasori found himself staring at Deidara dumbly, rather than taking in his angry spiel. His ward's skin was clearly sun-kissed, or rather sun-loved, as the tan threatened to overturn into a painful redness. His manhood was heavy between his legs and Sasori stared unashamedly at him, his muddy eyes wide in their dead sockets.

A vein threatened to burst in Deidara's forehead, his own nakedness not appearing to register or a lack of care keeping him from sitting down.

However, Sasori was too busy drinking in the sight of his ward's youthful appearance, secretly coveting it, to care. His fists clenched abruptly and he was suddenly overcome by the sudden urge to approach Deidara, to push him back gently onto the tiles and simply look at him.

_"__Oi_, aren't you going to say anything?"

Deidara's gaze was a violent mixture of emotion that confused the puppet-master. Yet he managed to pull out the most predominant: anger and confusion.

Sasori reluctantly pulled his eyes from his ward's alluring form and averted his eyes to the less beautiful tiles adorning the floor, "No. I have nothing more to say to you."

Sasori turned on his heel and all but fled the bathhouse in true 'Sasori fashion'. He ignored the dark urges clawing at his chest prompting him to return and gather Deidara in his wooden arms.

* * *

><p>Kakuzu did not expect to be disturbed so late at night and barely restrained himself from punching the wall and perhaps bringing down the entire compound with it. What did stop him was a surprising amount of self-control, but also the disturbed expression on the puppet-master's face. Kakuzu gestured to the stool, wiping the sleep from his eyes as he did so. This would probably take a while.<p> 


	4. Reluctant Realisation

**AN: The penultimate chapter. Kakuzu is at the top of his game in counseling, Sasori is enlightened, and Hidan reads extremely questionable magazines. Warning: it gets pretty sexual from here on out. And weird.**

**Chapter 4: Reluctant Realisation**

Sasori opened his mouth, but quickly closed it again. He felt strange.

He had been meditating for a good few hours after he had fled the bathhouse. Meditation had done little to soothe his troubled mind so he threw himself into work instead, desperately carving and sanding at his projects. However, his troubles seeped relentlessly into the forefront of his mind. Sasori had been struck by the fact that he wanted to reclaim Deidara's trust, but most importantly he seemed to crave his ward's loyalty. He'd already been aware of this, but Sasori had no idea to what _extent_ that he craved the boy's obedience and awe.

Talking to Kakuzu about Deidara's short-fallings was one thing, but to admit his attachment was not something that Sasori felt he could do. He did not like to talk about himself or his feelings. At all.

Minutes of silence passed and Kakuzu pinched the bridge of his nose in impatience. Finally, he leant forward and softened his voice, "Anything you say will be kept confidential between you and I. Bugger the Akatsuki."

Sasori's pale face was ghostly in the moonlight and his voice was barely a whisper.

_"I want Deidara."_

Sasori's chest tightened and a bout of nausea flooded him; it was all too real now that he had voiced his thoughts. To Kakuzu's credit as a valued ally and trusted friend, he did not allow surprise or disgust to pervade his features.

Kakuzu nodded and his tone was careful, "…and how do you want him?"

Sasori's brow knotted, "…I don't know. But he's _my_ partner and I can't seem to sit back and let him self-destruct."

Kakuzu sighed deeply, "Deidara is very unlike you, Sasori, and I don't think that you're entirely sure on how to handle that."

Sasori's confusion did not grace his features, "What do you mean by that?"

Kakuzu looked to be in deep thought as he answered him, "…Deidara believes in transience and you believe in endurance. As such, you can't begin to comprehend Deidara's ephemeral nature whilst he can barely get a grasp of your affinity towards eternity, but he _tries_, I'll credit the boy that."

Sasori frowned. Perhaps that would explain why he was so set on controlling Deidara's movements in the field. But what did he mean Deidara was _trying_ to understand his art? That was just not true. They had never agreed upon anything in all of their years of bantering. And Kakuzu's obscure answer still didn't explain his reluctance to let Deidara do his job as a recruit of the Akatsuki.

"But that doesn't explain why I keep holding him back on missions,"

Kakuzu's laugh was dry and his smile dryer still, "That's not something I can really help you with, Akasuna. The last time I had _any _relatable inkling was over fifty years ago."

Sasori nodded; however, he was displeased with Kakuzu's cryptic response.

Kakuzu's patience slipped. He was getting rather bored of these 'getting-in-touch-with-ourselves' meetings that Sasori was bombarding him with. He would have to be blunt.

"…so you want to fuck him."

Kakuzu was not surprised at the crash that sounded, indicating that Sasori had fallen off of his stool.

_"Kakuzu. What. The. Fuck."_

"Come on, you care about the kid and you don't want him to hurt himself," Kakuzu raised an eyebrow; "…uh, unless you're _into _that sort of thing."

"…"

"And if he blows himself up, then you can't fuck him, which explains your overprotective behavior recently."

Sasori was fuming, "I think there's a little bit more to it than _that_. And I can't fuck him, I don't have the… well, _the parts._"

Kakuzu leant back and snickered gently, _"I'm right, Akasuna_. Just admit it. And you'll _find_ a way to fuck him. I know how your brain works."

Sasori muttered underneath his breath and turned away. _Could it really be that simple…? Or did the Akatsuki treasurer just have an overactive imagination?_

"Fine, we'll experiment then. I confiscated this off of Hidan when he refused to clean up after one of his rituals for the twentieth time. It might help you."

Kakuzu threw a rolled up magazine at Sasori, who caught it gingerly. He blinked as he read the title.

"…_Bloodthirsty Bitches & Boy-Toys_? Really, Kakuzu?"

Kakuzu shrugged, "Don't look at me. Apparently Jashinism doesn't discriminate."

Sasori stared at it suspiciously, already wary due to the smutty cover featuring a very busty woman pressing her naked blood-stained breasts together and smirking viciously. It was nasty.

"Oh go on, Akasuna. Take a look. Maybe you'll figure out what you want to do with Deidara."

Sasori's fingers twitched murderously at the suggestion, but he began to flip through the magazine none-the-less. It quickly became apparent to him why Hidan had chosen this particular volume. On every single page were various couples fondling and doing other promiscuous things, usually with a lot of blood and gore involved. One even featured erotic asphyxiation using someone's intestines. Sasori quickly flipped _that_ page over.

Sasori instead focused on the less violent imagery, mainly that between any male couples, finding himself cringing at some of the bad-acting. However, as he took note of their entwined bodies, his head began to feel heavy and his heart seemed to quicken in its cavity. Perhaps he and Deidara _could_ try out some of these…positions.

When Sasori finally looked up, Kakuzu was smirking at him. _Smirking_. The bastard.

"See something you like then?"

* * *

><p>Once again, Sasori found himself holed up within his workshop, oddly still as his thoughts became obsessed with Kakuzu's advice and how it related to Deidara.<p>

Sasori looked down at his wooden frame. Even if he wanted to engage in promiscuous physical activities with Deidara, it was not a feat that could be safely carried out. Sasori _was_ a walking weapons crate. And would Deidara even want him? He couldn't feel anything, only slight sensation now and then.

There was also the problem of how to approach Deidara…he still had to successfully apologise after all. He couldn't very well instigate anything until the air had been cleared between them. It wouldn't end well otherwise. He needed to be sincere and most importantly, he needed to let Deidara be Deidara. If that meant he had to try and understand his fleeting nature, just a little bit at least, than Sasori would try.

But what about his apparent feelings towards his ward? Would Deidara even reciprocate them? And if he _did_ then what?

On the off chance that Deidara did want to have sex, what would he do? He couldn't do anything with this body without seriously harming his partner. Suddenly, an idea sprung into his head. Some of the people in the magazine, mostly the lesbian couples, had used certain objects to help them…well, yeah. Perhaps he could follow their example?

Sasori moved his wrist and his sketching paper descended from the shelf, his chakra strings attached to it. _It would require a body…and some intense thinking…but this could work._

* * *

><p><em>"JANEEEEEEEEEE<em>, Dei-_chan_!"

Kakuzu and Hidan left the compound the following afternoon, much to Sasori's irritation. He still had so many questions. However, a summons by Pein could not be ignored.

So it was that the four Akatsuki were gathered outside the front of Sasori and Deidara's compound. Deidara's face had turned an amusing shade of purple as Hidan had swung him around merrily, in a fashion akin to Tobi. A likeness which no-one present pointed out to save themselves the pain of Hidan's indignant shrieking.

Kakuzu placed a heavy hand on Deidara's shoulder and gifted him with a rare smile, "We won't be back for a while, but keep working on that _taijutsu_, kid."

Deidara nodded and let a wry smirk cross his lips. Deidara certainly liked to be complimented; Kakuzu had been right about that at least. Sasori tore his eyes away lest he attempt to capture Deidara's curling lips between his own.

Sasori had a serious problem.

To his dismay, Hidan smirked down at Sasori and offered him a callous wave before walking away. Sasori stared him down defiantly. The little shit.

Kakuzu turned to Sasori once Deidara had left, "Good luck, Akasuna. Don't keep him waiting."

"Thank you," Sasori said stiffly, shy about how honest he was with the man in front of him; "And I won't. You know me."

Kakuzu snickered and then turned on his heel, trailing after Hidan.


	5. Carnal Culmination

**AN: The final chapter of the epic saga...  
>Just kidding. But really, final chapter. Thanks to all my readers - especially those who have taken the time to let me know what you think.<strong>

**Warning: It's rated M for a reason. It gets pretty sexual from here on out.  
><strong>

**Chapter 5: Carnal Culmination**

Sasori hadn't left his workshop since the aptly named 'Zombie Combo' had gone off on their latest mission. However the loss of time had been worth it as Sasori had finally finished his newest master-piece. It had taken a few days, and a whole roll of his sketching paper, but it was utterly perfect.

Hopefully, if Deidara would let him, he would be able to please the boy with it. That was why he had built the damned thing after all.

Unfortunately, he would need to successfully apologise to Deidara first. But all of that time spent by himself in his workshop had given him time to think and he had come up with the best way to approach his ward.

* * *

><p>Surprisingly, Sasori never got the chance to approach Deidara. Instead, his partner approached him first.<p>

In a rare state, Sasori found himself in his unused bedroom, sorting through some files. He had never slept in the room, and would likely never do so. Sasori had finally left his work-shop, with the intent to sort through his personal belongings. Whilst he had the perfect plan to approach Deidara, he hadn't quite worked up the nerve to actually do it. Instead, he sat working adamantly in the pleasantly furnished, yet extremely dusty, room.

What he hadn't expected was to be interrupted.

A knock sounded and to Sasori's surprise, _Deidara_ entered with a sheepish look upon his face. He tapped his clay-stained fingers together nervously and his eyes flitted haphazardly from the floor to Sasori.

"…how did you find me?" Sasori said; his voice laced with genuine curiousity.

"Well, you weren't in your workshop and I searched everywhere else. I..uh, well…" Deidara cleared his throat loudly; "I came to apologise, hmm."

To Sasori's credit at puppet-maintenance, his jaw did not in fact drop.

"I've been ignoring you and treating you like shit, _danna_, you deserve better as my superior. So, I'm sorry, hmm."

Sasori wanted to smile, but despite Deidara's apology the boy was still acting unusually standoffish. As Deidara turned to leave, Sasori stopped him as he called out his name.

"Sit with me."

Deidara froze and a look of fear passed over his face. Nonetheless, he sat down next to the puppet-master on the neat _futon,_ keeping a relatively obvious distance.

Slowly, so as not to alarm Deidara, Sasori closed the distance between the two. He clasped Deidara's face in his corpse-like fingers, his teal nails clawing at Deidara's cheeks until they turned white. Deidara looked confused, but did not try to break away.

_"__I want you to tell me who you are."_

The boy's eyes widened in shock and quickly narrowed.

"This is stupid, Sasori."

"Just tell me."

Deidara scowled and rolled his eyes, "I'm Deidara. Ex-Explosion Corps. _shinobi_. Current member of the Akatsuki, hmm. Why?"

"That's right," Sasori nodded slowly; "And I'm Sasori of the Red Sand, devastator of an entire country, with your help,"

Sasori took note of the way Deidara's eyes brightened ever so slightly.

"…and I'm an S-Rank _shinobi_. Current member of the Akatsuki."

Deidara's brow furrowed, "Hmmm…what's your point?"

Sasori stared intently into Deidara's eyes, sensing his ward shifting uncomfortably underneath his death-like grip.

"My point is, _brat_, that you and I don't need anyone's approval. You're _the_ Deidara, ex-Iwagakure _nin_ and S-Ranked _shinobi_. _You are far from being a joke."_

Deidara was strangely silent, his eyes fixated upon his suddenly twitchy feet.

"I don't care what anyone thinks and neither should you." Sasori continued, his clasp becoming tighter if possible; "…and I'm sorry that I doubted that for even a second. I know you can take care of yourself perfectly fine and I shouldn't interrupt that."

The corners of Deidara's mouth lilted upwards slightly and Sasori felt a surge in his confidence, inspired to continue as the words began to run from his mouth involuntarily.

"A-and I don't care what the other members call us. They call us that 'old married couple' as if it's an insult, but I would wear that like a badge. Don't you think that says something about the bond between us?"

Deidara's ears had turned a vibrant shade of red and his eyes were comically wide. He gaped at Sasori's slightly aggressive confession.

"…uh, I didn't think about it like that. But okay, _danna_."

_Victory._ His title had been returned to him.

"No, I mean it, Deidara. You've always called me _danna_, after all. So as a real partner, I'm willing to inspire some truth behind that name. If you're willing too, of course."

Deidara froze and stared at his master dumbly. Sasori, not one for patience, looked searchingly at him. _Had Kakuzu been wrong? Did his ward even like him…?_

Deidara's hand came up to rest over Sasori's and he nodded. Sasori felt a flood of relief settle over him. His ward _did_ want him.

Smiling, Sasori leant forwards and slowly let his forehead touch Deidara's own. Tentatively, he brushed his lips against Deidara's, letting one hand caress the boy's face.

He pulled back, suddenly shy, "I can't feel you…but I still want you. You know that, right?"

To Sasori's relief, Deidara was smiling at him warmly. Not a common sight.

"If that's good enough for you, then it's good enough for me."

Sasori kissed him again, more eagerly, enjoying the way that Deidara responded to his touches, as if the boy wanted to be as close to his master as possible. And that was the best feeling in the world.

Sasori pushed Deidara back gently on the _futon_, and there was a glorious finality to the movement, a movement years in the making. Deidara's eyes widened in surprise as he let his head fall back against Sasori's unused pillow, his golden hair splaying everywhere.

_"__Now, now?"_

Sasori tilted an eyebrow, "We've waited long enough haven't we? And remember who you're talking to, I _hate_ waiting."

"Uh, yeah. I suppose."

* * *

><p>Kakuzu sat upon the stair of the smoking temple, chewing on sugar biscuits that Sasori had generously given him on his departure, with the musical sound of Hidan slaughtering scattering monks predominant in his ears.<p>

Suddenly, his sixth-sense activated. Sasori was finally using his bed sheets - _violently_. Calculations ran like clockwork in the Takigakure-_nin_'s head and he froze at the final cost of replacing the destroyed bed-linen. Kakuzu choked on the biscuit and passed out.

It was at least one blood-thirsty hour later that Hidan found him.

* * *

><p>Sasori pulled back from their deep kissing, his muddy eyes glazed over.<p>

_"__Wait here,"_ he breathed and quickly left the room.

He returned not five minutes later to find Deidara, still red-faced, lying on his bed.

Deidara looked him over as he approached, "You've been busy. What'd you do?"

Sasori loomed over Deidara and let his cable begin to unfurl from his stomach, keeping his arms locked at the boy's sides.

Sasori smiled wryly, "I made some adjustments to make this process considerably more enjoyable for you. Not to mention less death-inducing."

Deidara grinned, "Ah, sounds good then."

The cable began to snake its way up Deidara's thigh, making the young man shiver.

Sasori let his arms rest on Deidara's shoulders, eager to discuss his 'art'.

"See? No poison on this cable. Less ridges too. Nice and smooth."

Deidara nodded in approval, desperately trying to ignore Sasori's sultry tone and sexual implications. He blushed anyway.

"But wait, there's more. Take a look at the tip."

The tip of the cable waved slyly in front of Deidara's nose and he stared at it, shocked. Sasori grinned.

"W-well, I guess with this one I won't get impaled and die an agonizing death, right?"

Sasori nodded, "Yes, it's a nice round tip. I did put ridges on this one. Makes it a bit more _fun_…though I have others if you'd care to take a look?"

Deidara licked his lips hurriedly and shook his head, "M-maybe later. Let's just use this one, hmm?"

Sasori retracted the cable and let it continue its pleasant journey around his ward's body, letting himself finally lean in again to recapture Deidara's lips. As expected, he could feel very little at all, only the quickened thump of his heart at Deidara's incredible proximity. As for Deidara, well he was definitely feeling things judging by the deep noises sounding from the back of his throat. It was utterly maddening.

Letting Deidara guide him through the kiss, Sasori allowed his own hands to clench and unclench at the boy's flesh, wishing he could feel it beneath his dead fingertips. Deidara moaned and pulled Sasori closer.

Although he couldn't feel them, he sensed Deidara's hand mouths placing chaste kisses along his neck and face. The mere thought of it made the puppet-master smile into the kiss, and he pulled at Deidara's lip impatiently with his teeth.

_He needed to be closer._

The coil slowly unwound from his stomach cavity and wrapped itself around Deidara's wrists, hoisting his body high into the air. Deidara yelped at the movement as he was strung up above his master, though his knees were still touching the blanket.

Sasori stared up at him, remaining in his seated position, as the coil slowly wrapped around Deidara's abdomen like a python. Only Sasori made sure to keep the squeezing to a minimum. Not exactly like the magazine…but perhaps that was for the best. Sasori didn't want to accidentally kill Deidara after all. Deidara glared down at him bashfully, irritated at the amount of attention Sasori was paying to him.

Sasori's eyes were alight in awe and amusement, the beginnings of a sultry smirk crossing his lips. Deidara shook his wrists helplessly, unhappy with the lack of control Sasori was lending. Sasori was a puppet-master after all. Giving control was not something he would do lightly.

Deidara's breath hitched as Sasori suddenly pulled his shirt up to look at his abdomen and then back over his arms. The cable suddenly tightened around him.

The puppet-master gasped, _"Oh_, you have been working on your _taijutsu_."

"Th-that's embarrassing!" Deidara managed, his ears practically letting off steam.

Sasori ignored him and let his fingers trail over the boy's stomach, enjoying the uneven movement that resulted from Deidara's panting. Surprising Sasori, Deidara all but _whined_ as the puppet-master let his fingers trail lower, dancing across his hipbones and moving inwardly.

_"__D-dammnit_, Sasori!"

Sasori sulked, "What happened to _danna_?"

Deidara growled as Sasori's fingers missed the mark yet again, "I'll call you _danna_ if you do your damned j-job!"

"How can I refuse an offer like that?" Sasori smirked.

With that, he let his hand slip downwards into Deidara's pants and wrapped his cool fingers around his partner's length. Deidara threw his head back and moaned. Loudly.

Deciding he very much liked that reaction, Sasori shuffled closer and began to move his hand rapidly. Deidara struggled against the cable and loudly vocalized his satisfaction as Sasori pleasured him.

_"__Danna, danna, danna!"_

Sasori ran a finger over Deidara's slit and quickly brushed backwards to fondle his balls. Deidara yelped his name yet again, his whole body shaking. Sasori did not halt in his ministrations.

"Glad to see you keep your promises, Deidara."

_"__Just let me come,_ _Sasori you bastard."_ Deidara sobbed.

Sasori frowned, "You've been hanging around Hidan too much, I see. For that we'll draw this out a bit longer. We haven't even gotten to the best part yet, after all!"

Sasori lowered the cable and let Deidara drop gently back onto the futon. He immediately clambered over him and nuzzled his neck affectionately.

"We're going to do this properly as husband and wife."

Deidara stared at him, only slightly irritated, "It's husband and _husband_."

Sasori grinned into his neck and began to kiss the skin there slowly. He'd wanted to do this ever since that day in the bathhouse…

"Very well, _husband._"

Sasori moved his fingers up to Deidara's mouth and was met with an incredulous look.

"What? All first-timers do it this way."

Deidara rolled his eyes, "Who the hell told you that?"

Sasori thought it best to not mention the magazine, so he kept quiet.

Deidara took Sasori's fingers in his mouth anyway, too lazy to get any lube himself. Plus, he wanted Sasori as soon as possible. Perhaps his master's impatience was rubbing off on him.

Sasori drank in the sight of Deidara sucking his fingers, his mouth engulfing them and his eyes staring up at him unabashedly. Sasori's chest tightened at the sight. _Deidara was finally his, no doubt about it. It felt overwhelmingly good to have such a presence in his life._

Sasori finally pulled his fingers back and let them trail downwards. To his surprise Deidara surged upwards and kissed him enthusiastically, his tongue toying with his own.

Deidara flinched as Sasori's first finger entered him, mapping out his inside. Their kiss became more heated as Deidara tried to distract himself from the pain. Eventually, Sasori eased in the second finger, and then the third. Deidara was panting and clutching at Sasori's back all the while.

Finally, Deidara relaxed as well as he could in his intimate state and let Sasori roughly fuck him with his fingers. He moaned at the friction and sobbed at the finality of it all. Sasori was reacting similarly, and if he was capable of crying would have done so.

Deidara shuddered as Sasori's fingers left his body.

"How do you want to do this?" Sasori asked carefully.

Deidara smirked, "All fours. I want you to fuck me well and good, hmm."

Not fazed by Deidara's bluntness, Sasori promptly flipped Deidara over onto his back and let himself trail a finger down the length of his spine. The boy groaned at the contact, which dissolved into a whimper as Sasori let his stomach cable unwind and wrap itself around the boy once again.

Sasori placed a hand firmly at Deidara's neck, his dead fingers curling tightly in his ward's thick golden hair. Deidara growled into the pillow, unable to move drastically due to Sasori's controlling hold on him. Meanwhile, the cable trailed around Deidara's abdomen, the cool metal sliding over his heated skin agonizingly slowly.

The cable then moved backwards, towards Deidara's backside. Sasori leant forward and kissed a trail down his ward's spine as the cable began to enter Deidara slowly.

"Th-those ridges were a _brilliant_ idea, _danna_." Deidara breathed.

Sasori pulled back and smirked, "Thank you."

Then the cable began to thrust into the boy steadily, making him groan in pleasure.

Sasori slowly folded himself over Deidara, his stomach touching Deidara's back, his hips pressed closely to Deidara's posterior. He moved in time with the cable and with Deidara's thrusts, wanting to replicate that intimacy despite his inability to do so. Deidara's groans were overly loud, not that it was surprising to Sasori. Everything about Deidara was loud, after all.

Sasori let his eyes close in bliss. _This was perfect. Deidara was perfect._

Eventually, Deidara came messily on the dusty sheets and collapsed gently. His breathing was uneven and his blue eyes were incredibly bright. Sasori lowered himself beside his partner and stroked his long hair possessively. Deidara was so beautiful. It was difficult to believe that such a fiery spirit was able to love him back.

Sasori pressed a series of chaste kisses against Deidara's shoulder as the blonde caught his breath. The puppet-master found himself lost in the moment of Deidara so close beside him, his skin covered in a sheen of sweat that was illuminated by the flood of afternoon sun streaming in through his window. The dust particles thrown up by their incredibly physical copulation were caught in the rays and smokily obscured the vision giving it an ethereal feel.

Sasori sat up to admire the freckles dusted heavily across Deidara's tanned face and the way his golden hair stuck stubbornly against his sweaty skin. For the first time in his sad life, Sasori felt _lucky_.

Deidara looked alarmingly content. Sasori looked down at him quizzically, but he did not even have to ask.

"That was _explosive,_ yeah."

Sasori choked, overtly flattered, "I wouldn't say it like that…I would call it…_intriguing_. The lingering promise of more…"

Deidara shrugged, "I can compromise, hmm. Sex is _artistic_, especially with you."

Sasori hid his face in Deidara's neck; _who knew the brat could be so embarrassing?_

* * *

><p>When the other Akatsuki members returned for that rare event in which they would share breakfast at Sasori and Deidara's compound, the now synchronized way the too artist <em>nin<em> moved did not go unnoticed. More-so, the fleeting touches that Sasori would make such as brushing Deidara's hip or shoulder were not missed at all.

When Kakuzu was paired with them for a mission a week later, he took note of their seamless teamwork and the way the two would dance around each other as they mercilessly destroyed their enemies. Puppets flew and retreated in time with the explosive sculptures being set off, each art piece being respectful of the other.

It was almost…_artistic._


End file.
